Freedom in the Friendship - Part 4: Insecurities & Past Hurt

Although the "twerkin' in the friendship" has been removed, I am happy to say that we are still friends. So many things have transpired since I wrote parts 1-3, so much has been uncovered and truth "sprankled" (yes, with an A) all around that I gave G-D the name #SaltBae because only someone that powerful can put you in places where light can be seen and truths revealed. Those things actually opened up more doors. Before I start this, I want to say I am praying for the healing of my brothers, especially those who have been deeply scarred by previous relationships. I ask that you not allow your pain of the past to keep you from loving again. I pray you can pick yourselves up and allow that woman that you KNOW is good for you to love you. You see her, you talk to her and you feel good when you are around her ... that's just the start. I pray you consume her essence and permit it to permeate through those walls of insecurities little by little, bit by bit.

I know I am not the only who has been friends with someone for awhile and every interaction is full of nothing but positive vibes and fun times, right? Doesn't it make it so easy to want to BURST out of the friend zone like

and cross those lines? Only thing with that is in doing so, doors are opened and behind them are things that you never knew existed. You find out about some of the deepest, darkest secrets of theirs lives; things that you'd never imagine. Some of these things would run a weak minded person away but nope, not you! You don't leave your friend like that because you know THIS is the time you stay and you stand with AND for your friend, letting them know no matter what you'll be there. It's crazy how they can say all the things that you like and want to hear without even realizing. You both know a love is possible but soon as they feel themselves getting closer and becoming vulnerable they run away; not just once but one too many times, running back to the friendship closet. This seems to be the safe haven. You, though, can say unequivocally there has been no doubt in your mind what you want from that friend. Each time they give a reason to walk away from the thought of an "US" they provide another reason to want to try it again. The question you ask yourself then is "what do I have to do to show you that you don't have to prove much to me?" They don't have to impress you ... truth be told them being themselves is all that's needed and most definitely good enough.

Let me make it personal now ... no one is looking for you to have it all together, hell I don't have it all together. How selfish of me would that be? You have all that it takes and that makes you so special to me. Watching you do everything that you do for others, overlooking yourself and your needs has been enlightening. You are so selfless, don't ever change that. Please stay just who you are but I will make ONE request ... stop neglecting yourself. Stop looking the other way when it comes to your needs. Stop running from your chance to be happy, from the potential love that is staring you in your face. Your imperfections make you perfect just the way you are, down to your every flaw. You are dependable, reliable and will do whatever it takes to make sure everything is all right even when you are going through some rough times. Through it all our friendship remains and it isn't going anywhere. I think you know that already, no matter what direction we travel. I believe in you and would love to believe in us but you are afraid, I get it. I am not to blame for the pain caused by anyone before me, so I ask that you not penalize me for it. I know some of where you have been. You have opened up and shared so much of you with me. I feel some of that pain you've felt when we are communicating. I hurt too when learning of the pain you've seen. You've come so far my friend and

I love what you stand for and enjoy watching you put your dreams in action. I wish you could see what I see when I look at you ... all of your goodness, your heart, your perseverance and resilience. I truly want to see you happy regardless and can not stress enough

Let's be strong together!

And for anyone asking or wondering, even though the TWERK has stopped, there's still a bit of a stanky leg going!