My Influencer

In my 49 years of life I have seen and done a lot of things, some good and some not so good. It wasn't until I became a mother that a lot of those things changed because I no longer had myself to look out for but 2 little ones that would watch and emulate my every move. As a parent we hope we are raising them the right way so that later in their adult life they are productive members of society. They don't always go the route that we want them to go but it was never our choice to make, only to mold them, influence them to be the best they can be. Most of us never think about how one day, they would turn around and do the same for us.

Actually her name is Deondrea or DeeDee as most of us call her. I remember at an early age how she influenced me. She was my flower power child. She loved everyone no matter there race, gender or religion. I watched her in awe for years because I had NO IDEA where she came from. She loved genuinely which a lot of us, by my age, had stopped doing. She was my little reminder and I thanked the Most High for her. This was my 16 year old DeeDee I think. My memory is garbage but it was somewhere along those lines.

Moving forward to 2010 when she began to influence me on another level. This is when she returned to her natural roots and shaved all of her hair off. I remember like it was yesterday. We both had hair appointments and were still members of team creamy crack. Lencola, our stylist at that time, started my head first. She was aware of what DeeDee wanted and put me under the dryer in another room while she gave my daughter the BIG CHOP!! She was creating the newest member of team natural and I had no clue. When I walked into the front service area I was STUNNED and SHOCKED to say the least. I couldn't believe she had cut all of her hair off. I had so many questions and I think I was a bit negative towards it as well. I apologize DeeDee, I didn't know any better. After so many years of being team creamy crack it was hard to believe that she had gone and shaved her head BUT this is where she became my influencer into the natural side. I watched her journey, the good and bad of it and something in me said I needed to support her and do better myself. In a little over a years time I too had my first big chop (one of many). I wonder what took me so long to join team natural but better late than never. The weekend that I returned to my natural roots we had our "It's Natural" photo shoot and shortly after DeeDee moved back to Virginia. This was the best send off. We have so many natural memories.

Look at my influencer and the growth in her hair. This growth is from a little over one years time! This was my goal. I wanted this beautifully created head of natural hair too but it didn't work out that way for me. I was too scissor/clipper happy but nonetheless I became a part of a team I have yet to leave and never will. Why won't I ever leave? Well, I've decided to loc. YEP I am going to join locnation with my daughter. She has given mom a new look at being a part of team natural. It's funny because anyone who knows me knows I love being bald headed, the shorter the better for me especially residing in Fl. It's way to hot for hair BUT watching her loc journey has been fascinating and I want to join. She started this journey in 2016 with a head full of hair and now it falls midway down her back. Isn't she lovely??

How can she follow up with influencing me from this?!?! Well, let me tell you. The next BIG influence came around 2015 or so. She began talking about the pescatarian lifestyle. For those who don't know, a pescatarian is a person who does not eat meat but does eat fish. I had began a healthier lifestyle venture in 2012 (see health blog for that story) and a few health scares of my own caused me to look into living a meatless life. I did not eat pork or red meat but poultry was my vice, especially chicken. Most people turn to sweets for comfort but chicken was my comfort food. After a few discussions I decided to join her in this venture. I also cut out dairy so it had become an expensive lifestyle to say the least. Organic fruits and veggies, no diary so nut milk replacements and seafood. Needless to say this life eventually became a vegan lifestyle for me. I couldn't influence her to join me though. (light chuckle) I thank her so much for this one nonetheless. She helped her mother become a better person and possibly live longer. SIDE BAR: sadly I've fallen off of the vegan bandwagon but I still eat well, healthy.

So on top of 2 of the biggest changes I have made, leaving team creamy crack/joining the life of a LOCstar and healthier eating, my daughter is also an influencer when it comes to my true passion. She will be a huge part of what I do with my communications degree. I have done radio, created podcast, been on other podcasts, hosted/emceed events and of course blog. I have a group called Mothers of an Incarcerated Son (MOIS) of which there are blog entries as well. I have wanted to do so much more for the group but was unsure what direction to take. Recently my daughter introduced me to a podcast called Ear Hustle, a non-fiction podcast about prison life produced at San Quentin State Prison by inmates. This podcast has provided the jump start I needed to get my creative juices for MOIS flowing. I now know what I want to do with it. I have listened to every episode of Ear Hustle and enjoyed them immensely. Thanks to my influencer for all she has done. My girl is the best! Mom loves you more than life.

Y'all be on the look out for the MOIS blogs that are coming soon. Families of PRISONERS are the forgotten victims and my plan is to help you remember.